Whether a baby survives nine weeks or 32 weeks in the womb, Laura says there’s a profound loss of the hopes and dreams that parents carry in their hearts from the moment they learn they’re pregnant. She says women need to give themselves permission to grieve. She also warns that their circle of friends might change.

“The people you thought were going to stand by you are often not brave enough to enter into this time of grief,” she says. “And yet there will be new people you never expected who come out of the woodwork to be by your side.”

Her advice to those friends?

“Do something. Anything. Don’t be afraid to talk about the baby, because you’re not bringing up something that’s not already on their mind 24 hours a day. And don’t be afraid to sit in the sad with people.”

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